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I'm supposed to not actively be an activist any more. However it seems you can take the girl out of activism, but you can't take activism out of the girl...

I encountered someone else's response to the Umbrella Question. That is to say whether transsexuals should be included within transgender and/or LGBT or not. They came down for being under the umbrella, but reading through what they had written reminded me of everything that is rotten and festering within the transgender community. All the things that have made me realise what I need above all is the freedom to express my disgust at internally-transphobic / transsexual-supremacist idea's being voiced. I'm just not safe bottling up emotions - especially anger and revulsion. That's why I'm quite so [mentally] ill right now and I need to change it.

The Umbrella Question is easy for me to answer. I truly believe I'm completely right on this one: We all make the choice for ourselves and none of us has the right to question or deride another's (different) answer. If some TS's want to split off and create some TS nirvana where they can compete in trying to climb a non-existent scrotum-pole to an equally non-existent place where they have some power over those around them, that's fine. But equally so those of us who want to be under the umbrella have the right to stand in unity with other transgender identities and our LGB allies.

To say that one group within a community is going to make choices for all within the community, that some will be defined as inferior and undeserving of equal treatment is fascism. It's the complete opposite to equality.

I won't stand silent as these views are voiced, to do so is against all my values. If that means standing alone, being insulted or excluded, so be it. I don't want to be part of a community that tolerates one part of it lording it over another. I don't want to work with those who think it's OK to sweep this kind of toxin under the carpet and move swiftly on. I don't want to hear stories about vulnerable people having their identities taken from them because they feel they must conform to what the loudest voices are saying, or that someone has had their identity insulted in the manner mine was when I took the grand dragon of the transsexual-supremacists on. I can take it, I know others have been reduced to tears and distress.

I'm not exaggerating this in my use of language. What is going on in the trans-community is a form of fascism. You can wrap it up as nicely as you like, but beneath the packaging is someone who thinks they are better and have the right to dictate how others should identify and express themselves.

Now I'm heading too close to outright criticism and I'm not going to be the kind of person who goes there anymore. If someone/something can't smell the foul stench under it's nose then...

Lastly, I'm not doing community activism right now. I feel there just isn't a place for someone who believes militantly in equality - between trans-people and trans-people and the wider community - right now. It feels very much like exclusion - If I behave, then I get to come in out of the cold. But I won't behave. I am militant in my beliefs about equality and I won't make myself ill deferring to others viewpoints from respect anymore. Which means that I pretty much won't be encountering transsexual-supremacists at events / conferences and the like. I may run into them at NHS consultations, and I'm very much afraid there will be a loud and verbally-violent argument. But I will not let go of my right to positively influence the healthcare provision of both myself and people like me. Maybe one day there will be an open and diverse transgender community in Scotland. I hope so. But all I can see are the people being damaged by those who wish to force their ideas of conformity on others.

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May 2014

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